Clever conversation

Mummy: Do you remember how to spell the different days of the week?

Ryan: I forgot.

M: How can you forget? What if you need to know which day it is? What if someone asks you or tries to bluff you? (Clever mummy)

R: I have a calendar. (Cleverer boy)

M: What if the printer makes mistakes and puts Thursday instead of Monday, Friday instead of Wednesday? How would you know if you don't know how to spell the days?

R: .....(cleverest mummy)

M: So if a person spells Wednesday as W-E-D-N-A-S-D-A-Y on the calendar, what will you do?

R: I'll take away the A and put E there. (Impressed mummy)

M: How about if he spells Tuesday as T U O O S D A Y instead?

R: I'll take away the 2 Os and put....

M: Put what?
R: Erm....put...put....
M: So what will you do?

R: Take out all the wrong letters and put the correct letters there! (Smart Alec son)

Till death do us part

3 weeks ago I received a call from my mom telling me that my uncle was hospitalized. This uncle is my dad's elder brother. He lives alone and was found unconscious at home. My dad visits him very regularly and calls him almost everyday. Recently he has been tired and lost his appetite. We found out later that he fell and lost consciousness.


Nobody knows when and how he fell. He was unconscious for about a day in hospital. The doctors were unable to identify the issue with him other than the presence of a virus in his body. He was intravenously fed for a few days and was given multiple doses of antibiotics. After he regained consciousness he asked for food and water. He was very thirsty but was not allowed to take anything orally for fear that the food may go to his lungs since he was very weak. We had to wet his mouth and let him suck on wet cotton swabs.


I tried to visit him as often as I could. It was a blessing that I was on leave that week due to school vacations. However, I also had to bring Keane to the psychologist and for speech therapy. So my time was more limited than I would have liked. I also had a business trip the following week. My family insisted that I continued with my trip and they would handle everything. Almost a week after I left, my uncle passed away in hospital.


I was sad that my uncle passed away without his own family with him. He divorced when I was very young and was estranged from his two sons. Apparently they came looking for him sometime back asking for money but never showed up again when they learnt that he didn't have much. He had friends and was closest to my dad. I wasn't much of a niece until recently. I visited him during Chinese New Year and would give him some money through my dad. I used to buy him liquor when I returned from my business trips until my mom started complaining. I regret that I succumbed and took the easy way out by following her wishes. It's easier to avoid nagging.


When my uncle was in hospital, our relatives visited him. I was there almost everyday during that first week. My mom nagged again about being in the hospital too often and for too long periods. She is a very weird person. This time I didn't listen to her. I tried to make my uncle comfortable. Even when he was just lying in bed and sleeping, I felt my presence made a small difference. At least someone familiar was there when he woke up. I told myself, if I didn't took the opportunity, I might never get a chance to do so again. Who knew that I would be right in the end.


This episode was another wake up call. Why do we always take our family members for granted until it is sometimes too late? I remember listening to the song "The Living Years" when I was in secondary school and being reminded to treasure the relationship I had with my dad. I was never close to my mom. Till this day we have a love-hate relationship. I try my best to be the obedient daughter but it is hard. Sometimes I have to do things just to make her happy. I try to do so while retaining my own principles. It is trying at times.


The saddest part about my uncle's passing was the reality of humanity or lack of it. There are people who do things out of convenience, there are others who do it out of genuine love and there are others who do things for others to see. Some people visit because they have to. Some people visit because they want to. Some stay away out of fear. Some stay away out of anger. My dad remarked that if my uncle was richer, he might have more visitors. My auntie, my dad's sister, told me that when her husband was in hospital years ago, he had many visitors. The nurses in the ward asked my cousin what line of business my uncle was in to have so many visitors. My cousin said his dad was a taxi driver. His dad was a very kind man. He must have touched the lives of many people during his time.


For a fiercely independent person like my uncle to lose his capability to take care of himself must have been hard. He kept wanting to go to the toilet but was not allowed out of bed because they feared he might fall. It must have felt a bit of a loss of dignity for him to have to poop in diapers. For an obsessively clean person, I think he was more upset about having to make a mess. To need to ask for help for everything must have been very hard for him. I am afraid that I will end up in the same condition one day. It is very frightening.


I wasn't able to attend my uncle's funeral but I wasn't upset by that. Funerals serve the living more than the dead. I didn't need to attend the funeral to have closure. My uncle was very considerate. He had previously asked for his ashes to be thrown into the sea so that no one would need to pay him respects at his commemorative tablet after his passing. That's what the family did.


I asked God to end my uncle's suffering as fast as possible - through fast recovery or an early release. I guess 2 weeks in hospital can be considered quite a short time. It was unfortunate that they couldn't discharge him from hospital as he would have preferred that. My brother told me he passed away peacefully so I am grateful God answered my prayers. I hope that God will show me some mercy when it is my time to go. More importantly that He shows my family mercy when it is my time to go.

Challenges

Recently, I received advice from one of Keane's trainers at Mindchamps. She said that Keane may need extra attention or intervention due to his behaviour in the class. He was uncooperative at times and wasn't able to accept that he wouldn't be called on each time he volunteered to answer questions. He sounds like a spoiled brat, doesn't he? He isn't and I'm not an over indulgent mother.

I was reminded of what the school counsellor said last year during the first parent teacher conference. At that time, the counsellor said he was going to continue monitoring Keane's behaviour in school. Since I didn't hear from him since then, I thought all was well.

What did the counsellor say back then? Keane was unable to control his emotions, showed reluctance to use words to express himself and largely kept to himself at school. It was an extension of his behaviour in pre-school with the exception that he could control his emotions with much effort and guidance. He was still unable to adapt to new situations or changes to his routine without advance warning.

I decided to bring Keane to a GP on my company's panel of clinics, hoping that it would be easier than going through the polyclinic. After a harrowing day, I was no better off. I went to the GP by myself in the morning and was told that the doctor had to observe Keane before he could write a referral letter. He advised me to go to the polyclinic which would be a much cheaper route. I was concerned about the timeliness of going that route so I insisted that I wanted to go through the panel. So I brought Keane back to the GP in the afternoon. It was another doctor in duty. This doctor didn't even talk to Keane but wrote a referral letter immediately. The nurses were unable to fix an appointment for me on the same day and asked me to return in the evening. I was unable to return in the evening but called back the next morning. Unfortunately the nurses told me that KK Hospital attended to only children below the age of 6. So the clinic wasn't able to do anything for me.


After much swearing to myself, I called the school principal. She said she would ask the counsellor to contact me. I was surprised that the principal was aware of Keane's behaviour. It doesn't seem like a good sign for my son to be in the principals radar.

When the counsellor called back, we fixed an appointment after a brief discussion of the situation. He saw some improvement towards the end of last year but the behaviour pattern returned at the beginning of this year. He was glad that I reached out to the school and shared more information about Keane's behaviour.

Keane is very good natured, generous and innocent. However, he faces challenges in adapting to new circumstances. He loves dancing and pestered us to let him go for hip hop classes. We signed him up for weekly hip hop junior classes at The Ballet School late last year. The first few weeks were distressing to say the least. He would run out of the class in frustration or throw a tantrum in the class. The strange thing was that he reported every disruptive action to me immediately after class. He knew that he would get into trouble but it never crossed his mind to cover up. Such was his innocence. On good days, he would run out of the class with his hair wet with perspiration and tell me he did well. On bad days, he would drag his feet out with a head of dry hair. It was painfully adorable. Each week, as I waited for him while having a foot massage, my heart was in my mouth, hoping the administrative assistant at the school wouldn't call me.

He was so disruptive that the administrative assistant advised me to pull him out. Keane was almost going to give up too. But his teacher said he was doing better and that he had a flair for dancing. I was not going to let him give up so easily so I had a heart to heart talk with him. I learned that he was frustrated because he was unable to follow the steps in class. I told him that he was there to learn, not to perform. It's perfectly normal for him to be unable to execute the steps at the first try. I told him that I would be disappointed with him for not even trying, rather than not being able to dance. After that talk, he was able to accept that he wasn't perfect and it was more important for him to try. My son had learnt the meaning of grit. However, disaster struck again when a relief teacher took over the class for a couple of weeks. He couldn't understand the change of teacher and sat out the entire class. After some explanation, peace returned the next week.

The same pattern happened at Mindchamps and at school when he had a change of teacher. The good thing is the adults realized this and prompted him of the changes ahead of time. With advance warning, Keane was able to accept new teachers much more easily.

During discussions with the counsellor, I learnt that he didn't mix with his school mates very much. He would eat by himself during recess and he would walk around by himself or sit outside the general office before recess ends. Now I know why he said he doesn't have friends in school. He refers to his classmates as "the pupils". However, he demonstrated positive interaction when he was with Xavier. 

Keane was still unwilling to use words to communicate if he could help it. He'd rather use gestures. However, he can rattle off facts he learns from reading comics or watching television programmes. He doesn't initiate hugs or physical contact. He hates it when his brothers kiss him, crying bloody murder about the onslaught of germs. He doesn't love anyone, if his answer to the question "Who do you love?" can be trusted. It took me almost a year to drill into him that his family members loved him. Our conversations used to go like this:

Mummy: Who do you love, Keane?

Keane: Nobody....

Mummy: Who loves you then?

Keane: Nobody....

Other than feeling heartache, I was very worried. Something is not right. So the conversations became:

Mummy: Who do you love, Keane?

Keane: Nobody....

Mummy: Who loves you then?

Keane: Nobody....

Mummy: No, Mummy and Daddy love you. Xavier and Ryan loves you.

A while later, it goes:

Mummy: Does Mummy love you, Keane?

Keane: Yes....(with much reluctance)

Mummy: Does Daddy love you, Keane?

Keane: No......

Mummy: Why?

Keane: Daddy always scold me.

Mummy: Daddy scolds you because he wants you to do the right things. When you do something wrong, Daddy will scold you so that you will remember what is the right thing to do.

Keane: Okaaaay.....

You get the picture. After a year, he can tell me that Daddy, Mummy, Ye Ye, Ah Ma, Gong Gong and Po Po love him. Xavier and Ryan too, although with some reluctance. His concept of love is not as developed as other children his age.

We did a test which was supposed to provide a gauge of Keane's development in 3 areas with the school counsellor. The 3 areas were social development, language and communication. Or something like that. The scoring was based on observations made by the counsellor and ourselves. His score for language was significantly low enough to warrant follow up with the education psychologist appointed by the Ministry of Education.

We met with the education psychologist who went through a similar discussion with us. We also noticed that he puts in a lot of effort to write neatly. The observation at the end is he needs help in the form of Speech and Language Therapy (SLT) and may need Occupational Therapy (OT) after further observation.

After a couple of days we received a recommendation letter which we were supposed to bring with us to the polyclinic. This allowed us to obtain a referral to the Child Development Unit (CDU) of the National University Hospital (NUH) at a heavily subsidized rate. We are waiting for the CDU to call with an appointment date.

Through this episode thus far, I discovered the vast improvement towards student care. We have never had such options in the past, at least not that I'm aware of. My colleague from the USA shared that the schools in the US do not provide such options. You would have to seek private help if needed.

I'm glad that we are taking steps towards helping Keane. At least we will know if he truly has Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). Knowing is a lot better than not knowing. I'll try to update as often as I can to share the experience with anyone interested in knowing. Wish us luck!

Staycation at Rasa Sentosa

During the June school holidays, we made a last minute decision to take a staycation. For those familiar with me, staycations are a huge part of my family holiday plans after one trip to Hong Kong Disneyland. The convenience and ease of a staycation never fail to attract us to the various hotels on Sentosa, namely the ones in Resorts World. This year we were faced with a challenge. Resorts World was fully booked!

Rasa Sentosa Resort and Spa by Shangri-La

After scouting around on the internet, I found that Rasa Sentosa by Shangri-La may be a good alternative. So I booked a 3 days, 2 nights stay for the family. When we arrived at the hotel, we ran into some friends who also made the same booking for the same reason. So we were a bit apprehensive since the hotel didn't appear to be the first choice among friends. Well, we were proven wrong over the next couple of days.

Deluxe Pool View Room with Twin Beds

The room was fantastic for a few reasons. Please note that we selected the deluxe pool view room which is bigger than most of the other rooms. We were unable to secure a room with a King sized bed but the one with Twin beds worked equally well.

1) There was a bathtub in the bathroom. This was a hit with the boys.

2) The floor was tiled rather than carpeted. This is a lot more hygienic in my mind and the boys could sit on the floor without me worrying about germs and bugs.

3) The sofa bed was the size of a Queen size bed! A lot nicer for the helper even though she had to sleep with one of the boys.

4) There was a lovely view of the pool, needless to mention.

There was free wifi throughout the hotel, which was fantastic. We booked during a promotion period and the boys had free access to the Kids Club. They enjoyed themselves tremendously. There were activities such as a walk, scavenger hunt and indoor activities like art and Wii (which topped everything). Food was provided free as well, nice! We also had free breakfast for the family at the cafe which provided a scrumptious spread, including a section just for kids.

View of the pool from our room

The pool was fun for the children because there were 3 slides for the kids, compared to only one at the Hard Rock Hotel in Resorts World. The pool was divided into sections for kids and adults.

Mother peacock with chicks

Peacock resting at night

We could see peacocks roaming the grounds during the day and sleeping on the tree outside our room at night. Yes, the peacocks could make their way to the branches of the trees, 4 stories high, and sleep while perched on he branches. I learn something new everyday, even when on vacation. There were squirrels scooting about as well.





Peacock perching on railing

The hotel provided free shuttle to Vivocity and this was very convenient for my parents who visited on the first night. We also went out for dinner with the boys on the second night. Window shopping at Vivocity is always welcome. There are also free shuttles within Sentosa from the bus stop near the hotel so it was easy to get around the island.

Overall, the hotel was very idyllic and not as urbanised as Resorts World. If you are looking for a quiet place to stay, without being too far from the excitement, this is the place to go to. I've asked the boys if they would like to return in December. I've received a mixed response - Xavier wants to stay at home (don't ask), Keane wants to return and Ryan wants to go to the Shangri-La in Penang because that comes with a huge indoor playground with big slides. We would most likely return to Rasa Sentosa.

Idyllic surroundings

My advice is to plan early and book fast!

What's been going on?

It's been a long time since I last made an entry. Many things have obviously been happening. My work has been keeping me busy but I have to be honest that I've been involved in more mind numbing activities like catching up on movies and watching television programmes. These are not really intellectually stimulating but provide a convenient form of escapism. So what have I been up to?

Let me start with the simple things first. I renewed my passport and was very impressed with the efficiency of the entire process although there was one thing that irked me. I received the notification that my passport was going to expire in February 2015 in the month of May 2014. "Why so kiasu?" some of you might ask. There is a very valid reason for that. Most countries require travellers to have a passport with a validity of at least 6 months before they allow entry across their border. The Immigration and Checkpoints Authority (ICA) warned me about that in their letter. ICA is also very aware of procrastinators like me! I didn't take action until late July. Why did I not take action? I have nothing but a lame excuse that I was travelling a lot for work during May. I had to follow up on the travels when I returned. I have already said it was a lame excuse.

By the time I decided that I couldn't delay the process, I faced the challenge of a photo. Although I knew that you cannot submit a selfie for a passport photo, I didn't realize it had to be taken against a white background with your eyebrows and ears clearly visible. You couldn't have any shadows either. So I don't know the power of Photoshop or other similar software. I went to one of those self service machines and found out it was $7 for a set of photos. I decided it was not worth the money because you only have one shot at the photo. After attempting to ask the hubby to take a photo for me, I decided that keeping my marriage happy for $7 was a very cheap price to pay.

I went to a shop at Toa Payoh to have my photo taken for $8 (soft copy only). I could choose the one which didn't make me look like a troll (see the value add with the extra $1?) and pick up the drive in 15 minutes. I went home and submitted my online application to renew my passport on the same day. Since it was already August, I was obviously a little anxious. After 3 days, I made an online enquiry and saw instructions for me to submit a hard copy of my photo! I was unhappy. Over the weekend, another 3 days later, I took the drive and went to a shop at Yishun to print 4 copies for $8. I should have had more faith in our government service. When I went home to print the instruction page for submitting the photo, I saw that my passport was ready for collection in 2 days. If I had the sense to check before I printed the photos, I could have saved $8. It was a lesson well learnt.

I made an appointment to collect my passport online and was prepared for a long wait even though ICA encouraged me to arrive within 15 minutes of my appointed time to avoid a long wait. I drove to the ICA building and was horrified that the car park was full. But I managed to secure a lot out of sheer luck when someone pulled out of his lot a couple of minutes after I put on my hazard lights. I walked to the building, followed the instructions and went to collect my queue number on level 2. I walked into the waiting hall, queue number in hand, and groaned inwardly because there were a lot of people seated in the hall. What happened end was unbelievable. The moment I stepped into the hall, my number was called! I walked up to the counter and collected my passport in about 5 minutes. All I had to do was inform the officer that I didn't have any other citizenship (why would I when I'm Singaporean?), had both thumb prints taken and sign an acknowledgement form. I was informed that the remaining period on my old passport was added to the 5 year validity of my renewal. I was in and out of the place in under 15 minutes.

I was very impressed with the entire process which was very efficient. Barely 2 weeks later, I was given another opportunity to observe the efficiencies of the system. I had to bring Keane to the polyclinic to obtain a referral letter (more of that in another post). The nearest polyclinic was in Yishun (see how ulu Sembawang is?). I took leave to bring him to the polyclinic, remembering how long queues used to be, on a Friday that was a school holiday. The polyclinic opens at 8am. I tried to make an appointment online at 7.30am but found that he is not registered with the polyclinic and my own ID was linked to my old mobile number. I called the customer service line at 8am and managed to get through after less than 5 futile attempts. It was evident I'm not the only one trying to be an early bird. The customer service officer who helped me register Keane and obtain an appointment was very helpful and efficient. I not only updated my mobile number but managed to obtain an appointment for 9.40am. The officer requested that I arrive at 9.30am for the registration process. Upon arrival, Keane was registered, including having his weight taken, within 5 minutes.

I was a bit lost in the polyclinic since we usually go to the GP on my company panel. But I managed to go to the right hall and we were in front of the doctor in less than 5 minutes. The doctor asked me questions, I gave her Keane's background and she spoke to him all within 10 minutes. The doctor decided to give us a referral letter to the Child Development Unit for autism and speech therapy, instead of only speech therapy that we came for. The education psychologist at the school was going to observe Keane before making a recommendation for autism. I'm digressing and divulging too much from my next post!

We went to the main hall to make payment and collect the referral letter. Everything was completed in about 10 minutes. I was extremely impressed that we didn't have to spend more time than necessary in the polyclinic. Call me paranoid but isn't that where a lot of germs can be found?

My point by sharing the 2 incidents above is to give kudos to the government service in being efficient where customer service is concerned. Being from a service industry myself, the importance of satisfactory customer service is ingrained in me. I was actually very proud when I went through the system on 2 occasions and found that I had a very pleasant experience. Why proud? Because I am Singsporean lah!

Happy 49th Birthday Singapore!

Values....a school's part

In an earlier post, I had some thoughts about values and the part teachers today play in imparting such values to our future generation.

I went to Endeavour to pick up Xavier after his badminton training and saw some interesting things which I want to share. These are what the students of the school see everyday as they arrive at school and during morning assembly.

One single banner shouts "No one owes Singapore a living". This is a very direct and true to heart. I wonder if it is a message to the younger generation who seem to lack grit to face adversity. This is less of their own undoing than the result of over-protective parents.

 

No one owes Singapore a living



Various banners



The other 4 banners say:

1) Singapore is our homeland; this is where we belong.

2) We must preserve racial and religious harmony.

3) We have confidence in our future.

4) We must uphold meritocracy and incorruptibility.



 

School values



 

 

 

 

4 mosaic pictures that say Integrity, Compassion, Diligence, Perseverance and Innovation stand guard at the entrance to the school building.

 

I am happy to say that my children attend Endeavour Primary School which has the right environment to drive the right moral values to my children. I am sure that there are many other schools like that. However, I cannot stress more than enough the importance of teachers. An environment is like a shell. The children need the proper guidance from the teachers to form the right character to ensure our future does not end at their generation.

 

Kudos to all teachers who make sacrifices to educate our future!!



7 Days' Juice Fast......I did it!

For the past few months, I have been trying very hard to shed the last few kilos to attain my ideal weight without success. I realized that it has to do with my diet, although I must confess that I am not working as hard in the gym as I did 1.5 years ago when I just started working out. I knew I had to do something to break the plateau.

Due to a happy coincidence, I got to know a couple (Bamm and Christina Hardie) who run a business providing healthy food choices. I started ordering from Munchster by Saladier almost daily. After about 3 weeks of their food, minus weekends and days where I have business lunches/dinners, my digestive system was cleaner and I lost a kilo. The best part is that their food is awesome. The Hardies have made healthy, clean and delicious food something which is attainable. A number of colleagues were sold after they tried Munchster. There is a group of us who order our lunches/dinners from Munchster regularly. They provide deliveries which make it so easy.

After talking to Christina more, I decided to go on a 7 days' juice fast to kick start my system and break my plateau. When I shared my thoughts with friends and colleagues, I received a mixed response. Some were concerned that I was going to suffer and others thought that it was too extreme and I should moderate the fast. However, a few encouraged me to proceed with my plan. With no disrespect to the others, these are the ones who are in truly good health and shape. The few who know that it takes effort to look good and feel good. Effort that is not restricted to just exercise. You need to watch what you eat. 80% of weight management effort comes from food and only 20% comes from exercise. Discipline is the key. That being said, I went ahead with my plan.

My diet consists of the following:
1) Juice from half a lemon with warm water first thing in the morning
2) About 800ml of juice for breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack, dinner and just before sleep
3) Coconut juice or herbal tea in between to stave off hunger pangs

I started my fast on a Monday. I had to make my own breakfast on the first day. It was a watermelon and kiwi smoothie which was quite easy to drink. I then have my juices delivered to my office daily. I consume 4 on the same day and 1 for breakfast the next day. I bring a cooler to the office for the transportation of the juices home for consumption at night.

On the first couple of days, I felt hungry very easily and I drank loads of tea to stave off the hunger pangs. I alternated between Rooibos and Fennel tea. I suffered withdrawal syndromes from the lack of coffee initially. I couldn't stop yawning on the first 2 days! I went to the gym on Monday and Wednesday. The workout on Monday was fine. I did my usual 2km warm up and training with my trainer and buddy. The workout on Wednesday was harder (my trainer pushes me harder when I'm solo) and I felt light headed before the end of the workout. My trainer said he would have offered me candy but he didn't want me to break my fast. That night, I had dreams that I accidentally ate some food!

This next paragraph may sound grotesque to some but it is a fact of a juice fast. Skip this paragraph if you are easily put off by talk of bowel movement. Christina warned me that bowel movement will be a lot more than usual in the first couple of days since the body will undergo detox with all the cleansing from a pure juice diet. The funny thing was that I wasn't affected that greatly because I normally did not have any issue with my bowel movement. I usually go twice or at least once daily, especially after I started taking clean meals from Munchster. During the juice fast, I felt like a baby with a super efficient digestive system! No need to go into more details.

I made it through the work week relatively easily. I think the fact that I lost 2 kg in 3 days helped me persist. I made sure that I planned my weekend activities around my juice meals such that I didn't have to carry my juices with me. It wasn't that difficult when I looked back since it was only one weekend. I simply ordered lunch for the family from Munchster on Saturday. I made sure I went back home after the kids' swimming to drink my lunch before I brought Keane to his MindChamps session. I drank my snack before I head out for the evening activities on both Saturday and Sunday and had my dinner after I reached home. It is a lot easier on a work day though.

The painful times during the juice fast happened over the weekend. I had to make sure my kids had their food but not partake. Imagine walking in the food court with smells wafting from various stalls, beckoning me to take a bite. The most challenging must have been during our regular Saturday movie night. Ryan was having some chips and Vincent having pretzel sticks. Both offered their snacks to me and I had to refuse. I can still vividly recall the smell of the cheese from Ryan's chips!!!

I am happy to say that, as of Sunday night, before my last juice meal, I lost 3 kg over the last 7 days. I am finally less than 60kg! I feel much lighter and happier. I shall try to go on a 7 days' juice fast once a quarter and a 3 days' fast once a month if I can. This week has proven a few things:
1) We can live without food for 7 days. I'm still alive and kicking.
2) We can do without meat. Protein does not come from meat alone!!!
3) We are what we eat. Eat right to live right.
4) Anyone can do this as long as they have the right motivation. Who doesn't want good health?

After interaction with the Hardies, I become more aware of the easy access to unhealthy food. Unhealthy food is cheaper and readily available. There are people out there who would shamelessly sell something unhealthy or unclean in order to make a quick profit. Yes, there are a lot of stories out there on the internet that make such proclamations. Honestly, I tend to take most of them with a pinch of salt. However, I do not disagree that the food industry is in need of a change. People need to be educated about their choices of food. Healthy food should not be something that only the well to do can afford.

To one and all, I encourage you to eat healthy and clean. Would you rather spend more on healthy food choices or doctors' bills in future? No one needs to be a fanatic to have a healthy diet. You just need to be mindful of what you consume and indulge only once in a while. Remember, you are what you eat. Here's to good health....and wealth....cheers!

Where oh where have our morals gone?

We had a big disappointment this week. We found out that Keane has been copying answers from the back of his assessment book during his practices! We were more disappointed than upset with him. We duly informed him that we were sad that he lacked integrity. We suspect that he just wants to get his homework over and done with so that he can play. He did feel a bit ashamed but I wonder how long that feeling will last. It is very disappointing because Keane is very good natured and obedient.

I have been trying to spend more time with him because it is evident that he lacks attention and he is slowly showing signs of middle child syndrome. I am bringing him for hip hop dance class on Saturday and enrichment class at MindChamps on Sunday. I must say that he committed to these willing before anyone accuses me of being a kiasu mother. He has been bugging me about hip hop dance classes for a while. Fortunately the hubby found a school at Ang Mo Kio. The MindChamps was something that just came. A consultant gave a talk at our company and I attended a free seminar, aka selling session, and Keane attended a trial class. He liked the trial class and wanted to go back for more. That episode is another chapter altogether....wait for it.

I had a conversation with Gabriel recently. That is if you consider a chat on Whatsapp a proper conversation. We were griping about how schools seem to have lost their focus on character building and the cultivation of morals. It's all about results, results and nothing but results. We guess that the teachers do have the key performance indicators to meet but the question is whether they are sacrificing the character building of the children in the process. I seriously think that a lot of this focus has to do with the parents. Competitive parents do give the teachers pressure. Another issue is whether we are attracting the right talent to the teaching profession. Are teachers as caring as they used to be? Are parents even concerned if their children are developing the right values as they learn? What are they really learning?

I am glad Xavier and Keane are at Endeavour. Their school values are: EDP=I2C. E is for Endeavour, the name of the school. D=Diligence, P=Perseverance, I=Integrity, I=Innovation, C=Compassion. Xavier knows this by heart. I'm proud that he holds these values to himself. He could articulate that Keane does not have integrity by copying answers from the back of his assessment book.

I can see some changes coming out from the Ministry of Education. As a parent, I am glad that there are changes. We have to build the character in our children! Academic results can only bring you so far in life. The most important thing we have to focus on as parents or caregivers is the ability to arm our children, our future generation, with the necessary tools for them to thrive and succeed. Succeed in their own way, not ours. Succeed in achieving what they set out to accomplish, not what we want them to accomplish. Succeed in making their lives meaningful and being able to do the same for future generations. That is how mankind can survive, failing which humanity may be lost eventually.

I have another interesting story on integrity but shall save that for next time. Later......

I'm back!

It has been more than 3 months since I last posted an entry. When I logged in today, I was surprised that I had more than 3000 hits. I realize that the post on Resorts World and public service were more popular.

I shall attempt to keep this up but since I have an actual full time job that feeds me, it will still have to be an attempt. I do have my priorities right, even though it may be at a bare minimum level.

To those who stumbled upon my blog by chance, do give me an opportunity to share my thoughts or at least entertain you. To those who are very patient with my inconsistency, I shall remain eternally grateful for your support.

Cheers!!

Public service and integrity

Recently there were 2 pieces of news which are grabbing headlines. Both are very different yet similar. One is about cleaning hawker centres and another about a grisly double murder. Both involve public servants.

One of the most important requirement for being a public servant is the ability to be a cut above others in terms of honesty and integrity. Your ability determines how far you can go but honesty and integrity, in my humblest opinion, determines whether you should be there in the first place. Yes, we are humans after all and humans are imperfect. I don't think anyone expects politicians or public servants to be perfect. The expectation, I guess, is for them to carry out their duties while holding their heads up high.

Does this mean that public servants will no longer be allowed to have their own private lives? To a certain degree, yes. You can maintain privacy but you must bear in mind that your life may be subject to scrutiny at any time. This is especially so in today's technologically advanced world. Access to information on the internet is very easy and whatever you do can be captured on a camera and uploaded for one and all to see. This cannot be taken for granted and must be on everyone's mind, politician or commoner alike.

That being said, do we maintain our integrity and honesty only to avoid being caught on camera? I think the motivation for good behaviour should stem from the heart and desire to be good instead of the need to avoid being caught misbehaving. That makes all the difference. If you have the right motivation, you will not fear being caught in the first place. If you force yourself to behave in a certain manner in order to conform, you will get caught out eventually. 纸包不住火，真金不怕火。

The most important guiding principle for everyone is to be true to yourself and choose to do something which you genuinely believe in for the right reason.

Swimming lessons and nasi lemak

The boys started swimming lessons at Yishun Swimming Complex last Sunday. They had their second this morning. I have not been to a public swimming pool in many years, more than 20 in fact. I'm not being atas....I just don't have a reason to go to a pool unless we were staying at a hotel.

 

The boys have group training with a certain Mr Yeow who is a coach with the Singapore Swimming Academy. $90 a month for each. They get a pair of goggles and a swimming cap. Not too bad. There's a play pool with slides. The boys go to that pool after lesson for about 15minutes. I think they secretly enjoy the play time after swimming lesson more than the lesson itself!!

 

 

We went a bit earlier today and the boys messed around in the pool before lessons started. 

 

 

They have been learning how to kick and get accustomed to being in the water. Xavier can swim by himself with the aid of a board. He is learning how to swim without the board. Keane and Ryan are still learning how to kick the proper way.

 

Swimming is a survival skill which every person should have......

After swimming we went to Sembawang Shopping Center for lunch. There is a new restaurant which sells nasi lemak called My Nasi. It's the second attempt by the Paradise group at the same location. It was previously a Kungfu Paradise restaurant. The food was not nice and much lesser value for money than what is available at the food court or even at Aston's. I can see the nasi lemak heading in the same direction unless they make some changes. The first thing they should do is to train the staff to serve the food faster. There was a long queue although the restaurant was not full because the staff took a long time to serve the food. Secondly the otah should not be served in the tiny leaf it comes in. The otah is not big but it is a relatively decent size. However it is served in a leaf that is not much bigger than the otah itself. This gives the impression that the otah is very small. Better to serve the otah without the leaf or with the traditional sized leaf. Thirdly the chili needs to be improved. It's neither very hot nor very sweet. In other words, it lacks character. The oil from the chili was seeping out to the bottom of the plate, snaking beneath the rice.

The only thing that makes me think that the restaurant has a hope of surviving is that I see someone looking vaguely like Eldwin Chua, the CEO of Paradise Group which owns this restaurant and the Kungfu Paradise, in the restaurant, helping out to clear tables. It is probably someone who looks very much like him but at least it appears to be someone from higher management. The people who own the business must have a hand in the business to make it viable. The good thing is the change in concept without much change in the décor or set up gives the restaurant owners a second chance of getting out of a lose making lease commitment. I wish them the best of luck!

Lazy weekend

We didn't do much this weekend. We watched Fast & Furious and Fast Five on Friday night and ended up going to bed at 3am on Saturday morning. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift wasn't as good as The Fast and The Furious and 2 Fast 2 Furious so we were a bit apprehensive when we embarked on the 4th movie. It ended up being very much worth the late night.

Father and son walking

The boys slept in on Saturday and Sunday. It was Captain America that kept them awake on Saturday night.

On Sunday we took a slow walk to Sembawang MRT for a train ride to Woodlands. We left our home after 12pm and figured that parking would be a serious challenge at Causeway Point. We were right. When we arrived at Causeway Point, we could see a long queue of cars waiting to enter the car park. Although the train ride would have cost more than the parking, it saved us an inordinate amount of time. Plus the boys were hungry.




We had lunch at Ichiban Sushi in Causeway Point and stopped by Secret Chamber to pick up some Lego pieces. I chose a Grand Prix Racer for myself while the boys selected the following:

Xavier - Legends of CHIMA Eglor's Twin Bike
Keane - Legends of CHIMA Nest Dive
Ryan - Creator Super Racer




Xavier's Lloyd ZX

Ryan's Ninja Kai

Keane's Laval

Any surprise on the selection of key chains? The key chains are now fixed onto their school bags. We are wondering how long they will stay on the bags.



We then went to Gelare for ice-cream. Xavier loves his Cookie Dough and Keane his Cookies and Cream. Ryan is not a fan of ice-cream. Daddy and Mummy had our much needed cups of coffee.








What remains to be seen is the first day of school after a 4 week break. Wish us luck!!!!

Random thoughts

A friend told me that I have this tendency to come up with random thoughts. I have never given it much thought but tried to do an inventory of my thoughts after I received that comment. I realize that I had to agree with him. I can be thinking of what I'm supposed to do in the afternoon but then the thought of lunch will come in. Yes, you may say that I'm probably trying to schedule my day. How about thinking about my facial appointment this afternoon and then about how much I need to go on vacation by myself? Again, you might say there is link.

I am a person who cannot manage lists. I can start a list but I never ever come back to that list. When I was dating someone many years ago, I was looking for what I thought then were things to spice up the relationship. I made up a list of things that we should do as a couple. I wrote it down and then we embarked on this journey to accomplish these tasks. Obviously we never completed the tasks on that list. I forgot about going back to the list and called off the relationship some time after for some other reason. When I look back today, 20 years on, my perspective on that relationship has totally changed. I can only use 2 words "So juvenile!!!!" on the me then.

Lego Supercar

I learned that I'm easily bored. I need to have a very clear objective or final goal to stay focused. And the objective has to be challenging. For example I can stay up the whole night to finish up a novel or to complete putting together Lego's Supercar (which I just found out to be a retired product!!!!). This now brings me to my next challenge of putting together Lego's Extreme Cruiser. I've put it off for a few months now. Time to get to work.



Challenging is when a lot of people say it's too hard or it's very unconventional. I like to be able to tell myself that I am better today than I was yesterday. The way I do that is to always do new things. Yes, yes, some people will say that I am a show off. I do not deny that. But I blatantly show off only to my pals and blame it on my Teochew genes! I would add a smiley behind this but I don't know how to do it yet. (How to show off like that?!?!?)

I lose interest unless the topic on hand is very intriguing. What fascinates me is even more random. I am intrigued by the cultural revolution in China, the thoughts of the Dalai Lama, the mafia in the US, army defence strategy, Lego, Mother Teresa, etc. I'm trying to illustrate the broadness of it all.

Why am I writing about random thoughts? I see a bit of myself in Xavier where this is concerned. Xavier is a very curious child. He can jump from one topic to another very quickly. He gets bored very easily. He can read a few pages of a book and give up on it if it doesn't grip him from the start. On the other hand, he can complete Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan in a few days. He devoured the entire 5 book series of Fablehaven by Brandon Mull in less than a month. He gave up on The Hobbit after less than a chapter. He didn't even start on The Hardy Boys but has completed all of The Famous Five. When he is into something, he gets into it in a big way. He will beg, plead, bug or manipulate his way into us buying the entire set in any series of books that he likes. Or he can eat otah for lunch and dinner for 5 consecutive days, only to give up after a tummy ache.

He saw me making an entry yesterday and asked me why I blogged. I told him that it is to leave something behind so that I can remember my thoughts years from now and for him to see my thoughts if he comes to the blog in future. He got all excited and wanted to update his blog but gave up after all of 5 minutes. That's my boy.

Hello, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty.....crazy!

The silent cat has struck again! This time it has struck a chord with Singaporeans who are Kitty crazy. I still don't understand the fascination with a cat without a mouth.

I learnt about the new Hello Kitty series of plush toys when I noticed a colleague having McDonald's for breakfast recently. Let's call him Bruce. Bruce had been having breakfast from McDonald's every Thursday for a few weeks, all in the name of love. Not love for McDonald's but for his fiancé who is a Hello Kitty fan. He was collecting all the Hello Kitty plush toys which can be bought at S$4.60 with the purchase of a value meal or at S$10 without a meal. A new plush is introduced every Thursday. He doesn't even like the cat. This week was meant to be the last week he has breakfast from McDonald's. This week is when they launch the special black coloured Kitty called The Singing Bone Kitty. (The cat cannot sing so the bones had to step up???)

Bruce's plans went awry when tons of other people started out earlier than him. The toy goes on sale from 12am on Thursday morning at 24 hour outlets. Fans were queuing way on Wednesday night. He went to 2 outlets and staff at both outlets had to turn people away when the queue became longer than the supply of the plush toy. He then promised his fiancé to go to outlets that open at 7am way before opening time - 5am. Alas! There were people who were earlier than him! Apparently news of the long queue spread and everyone went to queue earlier than usual. And the queues were again longer than the number of toys available. Lucky for Bruce, fiancé's friend was lucky enough to have bought 2 pieces!! I cannot imagine his fate if the set was incomplete!!!

This phenomenon hit the headlines on The Straits Times this morning. Apparently there were disputes and police were involved at one McDonald's outlet. The funny thing is that not all in the queue were there for the love of the Kitty. Some were there for the love of money. This obsession for limited editions of the cat is obviously a good chance for people with too much time on their hands to make a quick buck. Some of the plush toys went on sale on the internet and after browsing, I came across some sites which had advertisements for the toys. The cats were going from S$20 to S$250.

Is the cat really that cute? Are the toys really that worth collecting? Worth is subjective and one's man meat is truly another's poison. I received a pair of Hello Kitty plush toys as a present before but I don't remember where they are now. I must have given them away. I don't remember the person who gave them to me but the cats must have been worth a lot to him or her. Unfortunately these cats do not strike a chord with me. Can they strike any chord at all without a voice?

The moment the words "limited edition" are used, the value of something goes up. This is pure economics - demand and supply. Low supply matched with high demand result in high price. That price may not be just monetary in many cases. Some people pay with time and effort while others pay with hurt and pain. I'm not just referring to the Hello Kitty plush toys here. If you are in love with a special someone (low supply) who is very attractive (high demand), you may end up paying a price by getting hurt and feeling pain in the process of trying to capture the heart of this special someone. But if you think it's worth it, no one can say you are doing something wrong or something silly. No one can tell you that it's not worth it because that's the price YOU are willing to pay, not THEM.

The pursuit of happiness comes with a price but the reward is indeed priceless. To one and all, I say - to each his own. As long as you are happy, no one can say you are crazy.

Staycation at RWS.....again.......

We were very blessed this year that the haze cleared up during the weekend and we had almost clear skies when we checked in at Hotel Michael on Monday. At least the PSI was in the moderate zone.

Berrylicious smoothie

Hard Rock Cafe - recommended!!

We arrived in Sentosa earlier than check in time so we went for lunch at Hard Rock Cafe. It was a lovely lunch and service was very good. Check out the garnish on my smoothie....I think it was Berrylicious or something to that effect.


It is the fourth time we staying at Resorts World Sentosa but the first time we are booked at Hotel Michael because it is cheaper than our usual Festive Hotel. The kids were a bit puzzled because they are so familiar with Festive that they thought we were lost when we made a left instead of right turn as we came up the escalator to the main lobby.




The room was smaller than the Festive Hotel. My mom was disappointed because when she was given a complimentary stay at Hotel Michael, the room was very big. We figured they gave her a suite rather than a deluxe room. It's funny how hotels make the word deluxe turn out so ordinary. The room was cosy enough except that the bathroom door didn't come with a lock so we had to ensure we coordinated bathroom times to avoid unnecessary embarrassment with our helper.

Oh where are the towels???

The first thing the boys did was to hit the pool. They love playing in a pool and since we don't have easy access to one, they made sure they took advantage of the pool at the hotel every time we have a staycation. They went to the pool for each of the 3 days we were at Sentosa. The only thing was the pool was smaller at the Hotel Michael and there were a couple of pain points. On Monday afternoon, the hotel seemed to have miraculously ran out of towels. The towels are normally placed on the racks unattended. This is convenient for the hotel guests if there are towels. Check out the empty racks.

One of the service staff who happened to walk past helped us to call the front desk to ask for towels. No towels were delivered after 10 minutes. I walked along the corridor and asked a housekeeper who was working if there were towels available. She said she did not have any and there were none in the rooms as well. 5 minutes later I called the front desk to ask for towels. This was followed by another frustrating call another 15 minutes later. During this time hubby managed to find another housekeeper who conjured up 1 towel for us. She had nothing left. The towels were delivered fresh from the laundry 5 minutes after the last call. I did receive an apology during my last call.

We did an analysis and find that there is a lot of improvement that could be made. The fact that the reception area at the pool/gym was unattended poses an issue because guests could just walk off with the towels into their rooms. There was basically no control over the number of towels being returned after use. We noticed that Hotel Michael provided white towels at the pool/gym unlike Festive Hotel which provided orange coloured ones. Guests would easily remember to return the towels because they are of a different colour from the ones in the room. The differentiation would probably make it easier for the distribution of towels after laundry. I wonder if the hotel has an exceptionally high number of inventory loss where towels are concerned.

The accused....the ledge

Another concern was that the lack of towels made the entrance to the pool area very wet. Guests were dripping water on the tiles as they were leaving the pool without towels. It was very slippery. The entrance to the pool area had a door frame which had a ledge on the floor. This made it very easy for highly excited kids, like mine, to trip as they rushed to the pool. This is very unsafe when you add the slippery floor into the equation.



Xavier with his blaster

Keane and his blaster

Anyway, safety issues aside, the kids had a blast of a time at the pool. No picture of Ryan because he didn't have his goggles on.

 

Since the kids don't really go on the rides at Universal Studio, we spent Tuesday afternoon at the aquarium. It was more crowded than it was in November last year. This time we took a slower walk and I was able to capture some creatures on camera.

Belly of mantra ray

Starfish

Here's some undersides for viewing....interesting how the star fish can grip to the side of the wall.

Here's looking at you babe.....

Looking right back at you

The only fish that I could capture easily were the big and slow ones........other than the jellyfish!!!!









Interesting forms of jellyfish......the lighting create some special effects too.








Japanese Sea Nettle

I don't remember the species....yes, was too lazy to write down except for one......but jellyfish are really fascinating in the dark.








Dolphin....?

Black tip reef shark

The one thing I was curious about was whether the dolphins and sharks can really feel comfortable living in confinement.








Nice yellow coloured fish.....again unsure of species, sorry!!!!

Moray eel going after a fish?

Checking own reflection

Some pictures taken by Xavier at the Moray Eel section.








The only other place we frequented (frequented means more than once) was the candy store.

Candylicious!!!

On the whole the trip was fun and we were really fortunate that the weather held in that part of the island for us. I am trying to find another hotel we can stay at next time.