Thursday, August 16, 2012

Gifted or not gifted.....is that really the question?

The Gifted Education Programme (GEP) in Singapore is designed to nurture gifted students in an environment that is different from that of a normal school. However, over the years the programme has managed to create a lot controversy. What has seemed to happen is the clamour of parents to get their children into the GEP, regardless of their child's ability. Many try to find tutors for their children, in the hope of being able to boost their child's chances of getting into the GEP. And I thought that a gifted child was a gift of nature not nurture.

There has been a lot of talk about tuition being offered nowadays. This is mostly a result of the exposé on a certain man who made several false claims related to GEP on his credentials. Initially I didn't understand why these parents trusted the man and sent their children to his home for tuition at S$500 per session. After thinking about it, I can understand their desire for their children to get into the GEP. On the surface it is normal for parents to want the best for their children so they do whatever they can to give what they think is best for the children. The key question here would be "What is best for the child?". There would be parents who would argue that children do not know what is best for them, so parents should make the decisions for the children. I will tell these parents in the face that they underestimate the power of children.

Let me relate the story of how Xavier ended up going for Chinese tuition from July 2012. Xavier has always been doing well in school both academically and socially. He gets very decent grades for all his subjects. Decent being more than 90%. Some parents might say that I am expecting too much. I always expect him to do his best and I do not expect him to be the best. Just be the best that he can be. Who would know a child better than his parents, other than the child himself? One day Xavier came out of school looking very miserable. His daddy asked him why he looked so sad and he said he received his Chinese test results that day. When asked what he scored, he said he had 14 over 20. That set off the alarms because he never did this "poorly" before.


We went through his test paper during lunch and found that he made several careless mistakes and he didn't put in effort to go through his textbook before the test. I told him that if he continues to show such grades he may not be in the same class as his friends next year because his friends get very good grades consistently. He said he wanted to be in the same class as his friends. So I offered him tuition if he doesn't improve his grade for Chinese in term 3. He refused. I thought that he didn't want to go for tuition and was very prepared to drop the subject. To my surprise, he said he wanted to go for tuition immediately. We agreed to let him attend Chinese tuition starting from the next available class at a tuition center near our home.

This is proof that children can evaluate a situation if it is clearly explained to them. They know themselves and they can tell you clearly what they want. Take music classes at Yamaha for example. Xavier loves music classes but he is too lazy to practise at home. I told him that his music classes will get more difficult as he progresses and he would need to make a conscientious effort to practise daily if he wants to progress. I offered him a chance to give up music. But he refused and has been making an effort to practise at least 3 times a week.

Keane, on the other hand, wanted very much to go for music class. After 2 terms, he started to show the same lacklustre effort in practising. So I offered him the same chance to give up music and he took it. At the end, we realized that he wanted to go for music class because it was an opportunity to go out on a weeknight and have fast food! After we started to bring him along when Xavier started a different schedule at Yamaha, he gets fast food without having to attend the class. So he decided to give up his music. We didn't force him either. Ryan has no desire to go for music class whatsoever.

There is an increasing number of children who attend tuition classes, starting at a much younger age. You may ask how I know. I didn't check statistics but I can tell by the number of tuition centers that are mushrooming all over the island. One good example is Sembawang Shopping Center. There are now about 4 tuition centers on level 3 of the mall. I cannot imagine how the centers can survive if not for the demand. Nearby, opposite Sun Plaza, at the building where the HDB town council is located, there are 3 centers on level 2. That's where Xavier goes for Chinese tuition. It seems that tuition is compulsory for many children nowadays.

I truly understand that many parents are both working so they do not have time to teach their children personally. It is acceptable that these parents send their children for tuition in subjects they are weak in. What I cannot really accept is how some parents pack tuition and enrichment classes for their children on weekdays and weekends. There are some exceptions where the children enjoy and in fact crave for these classes. However, that is the exception rather than the norm.

I think we should let the children take the lead in their lives. My parents never sent me for tuition except when I was supposed to keep my brother company when he had a private tutor come to our home. This was when we were in primary school. It was more economical to have the tutor teach both of us so my mom thought "Why not?". It was quite enjoyable for me because there was no stress. I didn't have any tuition from Primary 4 or 5, I cannot remember exactly. My parents didn't tell me which school I should to apply for after my 'O' and 'A' levels. In fact, they didn't even have much of an opinion and let me make the choice myself. I think I turned out fine academically. I don't have an honours degree but I managed to graduate from NTU!

To all parents, encourage your children to be the best they can be. Give them the support that they need. But let them take the lead and que sera sera.

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