Reflection

This is the 4th week that I've stayed home to look after Ryan. This month has been arduous. Xavier caught a virus and had high fever a couple of weeks ago. Last week Keane was suspected to have chicken pox but was actually down with a virus similar to Xavier's with high fever. Ryan's wound never seemed to heal. My patience has been tested frequently this month. Fortunately I have an understanding boss and he allowed me to take leave to stay home. He never pushed me to go back to office either stating that taking care of the kids was important. But I long to return to office. Not only do I have projects pending for my return, I also find that I am beginning to slack a little at home.

Today I gave my blog address to my long time friend and asked for his comment. He said it was a refreshing read and reminded me that it wasn't important who or how many people read my blog. Most importantly I have an outlet for my piteous creativity and hopefully share my experiences with interested readers. Thanks to Gabriel for your motivation!

I had a lot of thoughts over the last month and cannot wait to share them. I'll do it in chronological order continuing with the hospital experience. I am amazed at how inconsiderate people can be, being noisy without considering patients sleeping in the same room. At the same time, I am amazed at how much love people like nurses and doctors can show strangers in need of care and comfort. The world is beautiful and amazing. I don't understand how it works and I probably never will. But whilst I am in it, I will do what I can to keep the good going.

I learned that we all take things for granted and we need to wake up. The good days can only last so long and it is imperative to make the best use of the days given to us. I may not be around for my children as long as I wish I could but during the time that I can, I have to do my best for their good, not mine.

Something that caught my attention this month was the AWARE saga. I'm sure most Singaporeans are aware of what happened at AWARE so I won't go into too much details. If you want to know, google "AWARE saga" and you'll get as much as you need. My thoughts on the AWARE saga is probably similar to some people but my cynical outlook and too much CSI gives me too paranoid a view on it. I think it's all a scam and a whole load of overhype. If the old guard claims to be inclusive, why can they not accept the new team and allow them a chance to take office for a year and if the new team does a poor job, then re-elect themselves. Was the new team familiar enough with where the organization was heading before deciding that AWARE was diverting from its original objectives? After all the happenings, AWARE had a surge in membership. So was the whole event a publicity stunt? I wouldn't put it past the organization - this is my CSI mind speaking about conspiracy theories.

A heartening thing to observe is that Singaporeans are more vocal nowadays and more open. Is being open going against our traditional values? It is personal and subjective. Some of the comments made by the various parties involved and observers seemed to be self-contradictory to me. The whole focus seemed to be on sexuality education issue and how a team of women seemed to have manoveured themselves into the exco within the constitution. Sour grapes and sore losers to the old guard - the new team rightly said that if they were really keen and interested in what was happening at AWARE, the coup wouldn't have happened. It was a rightful wake up call for the old guard in my opinion. They took too many things for granted. It seemed like a "don't fix it if it is not spoiled" situation resulting in dwindling memberships and less public awareness of the organization and its objectives. Of couse, on the other side of the coin, the new team could have started their own organization if they were really interested in contributing to society and didn't agree with what AWARE was doing. Furthermore, the team of well educated and matured ladies should have considered the consequence of bringing in a religious take into the situation whether intentionally or not. People are definitely going to cry foul, especially in a mutli-racial, multi-religious country like ours.

At the end of the day both camps emerged from the scene in a cordial manner. The winners because they think they have made a point and won. The losers to hang on to any shred of dignity they had left. I salute the team of ladies who braved the situation, taking in criticisms in all forms and manner and left holding their heads held high. But I also think that they could have carried out their intentions in a better manner but it's always easier to speak with hindsight. I say we should live and let live and learn how to agree to disagree. I'm sure that the lesson learnt will bring about changes to AWARE's constitution to protect the core group's interest in AWARE. I'd like to thank everyone involved in the saga and the journalists who gave fantastic coverage for giving me a great learning opportunity.

Interesting lyrics from the theme song for TV8 series currently airing at 9pm on weekdays:
每个人都不普通...每个人都不同 translates to everyone is not ordinary, everyone is different.