Domestic helper woes......again

Our domestic helper who joined us in November is giving me a headache.....

Last week hubby heard Keane crying very loudly in the shower. When he went to check out the cries, he saw long red marks on Keane's forearms. Keane said auntie pinched him. Apparently she grabbed his forearm very hard and squeezed it extremely hard. She then tried to cover up the marks with powder. Hubby questioned her and she admitted to hurting my son after he hit her. Call me biased but that's no reason to cause hurt to a 4 year old kid. Keane may be stubborn and because his communication skill is weaker, he can test our patience at times. But she still shouldn't have squeezed his arm so hard. I tested it on myself and found that only a very hard squeeze could leave such a clear a mark on my arm. And for the mark to stay on long enough for my hubby to ask questions and take photos, it must have been painful.

Hubby gave her a verbal lashing about how she was not supposed to do that. A couple of months ago we found a very big scratch mark, probably caused by something other than a finger nail, on Keane's shoulder. He told us that auntie scratched him. She denied it when confronted. That time hubby gave her a warning that we don't want her to physically hurt our kids. She cannot cane them or beat them. If they are naughty, she has to inform us and we will discipline them. And trust me, we do discipline them. It's a combination of scolding, caning and quiet time on the balcony. Not so quiet time. More like 10 minutes of mummy's nagging.

So this incident really pissed us off. Coupled with the fact that she was caught lying about her mobile phone. Initially when we fetched her from the agent, we asked if she had a mobile phone. She said she didn't. A couple of months later, Xavier saw her on a mobile phone, sending SMS. When we asked her about it, she denied it. A few weeks later hubby saw her talking on the mobile. She then said she lied because she didn't want us to confiscate her phone. He told her that she has to do all the housework before she uses her phone. When he caught her with it, the housework was not done. Thereafter, she began to start going to her room around 8pm, off the lights and start using her phone in the dark. There were several occasions when she would doze off during the day due to lack of sleep from using the phone till late at night. We know that because there are times when I went to her room to take something from my cupboard and see her mobile phone light in the darkness. The latest trend is for her to do housework while talking on the phone or listening to radio on her mobile.

I called the agent last week and informed that I wanted to find a replacement. The agent sales representative was not very enthusiastic about helping us find one. She asked me to go on the Internet to look through the bio data before giving her a call. I saw 2 that I thought were suitable and she ended up giving me the telephone numbers to interview them myself when I requested for an interview. The best part was that the numbers were not valid!!! The person who answered the phone was not the same as on the bio-data. The other one was not in use.

Am I destined to have domestic helper woes most of the time????? Help!

May is coming

The month of May is always a busy one for us. All three boys are born in the month of May by pure coincidence.

Xavier is very excited because he has requested for a Lego set for his birthday. The Scorpion Pyramid from the Pharaoh's Quest collection. I placed an order online and arranged for the set to be sent to my friend's house in the US because Lego in US does not deliver to Singapore. I tried to use VPost but was informed by Lego that the VPost address was blocked due to fraud. I was pretty perplexed by the situation at first. Here I was, willing to pay up front with my credit card, but unable to place an order. Finally Jerry came to the rescue...actually I forced him to.

Then the order was messed up. I ordered a few sets which Lego put into 2 separate packages for delivery. True to Murphy's law, the box with the Scorpion Pyramid has not shown up yet. Xavier's birthday is on 4 May. I may end up spending a lot of money just to ship the Lego by Express USPS service. There goes the savings from ordering online.

Keane and Ryan are going to have birthday celebrations in school. I'll be spending the next weekend buying things to put into bags for the kids. The kids in school look forward to receiving a goodies bag during each friend's celebration. It has somehow got to a point of being competitive.....I have not decided what presents to buy for Keane and Ryan yet.....ideas?

I recently had domestic helper woes again....will update in another post. That will take a long time and I'm tired after a long day at work.

Singapore's General Elections

It's been a while since my last post. I travelled to China once and has since been "grounded". It does feel nice to sit at my cubicle and feel I belong somewhere.

There has been much coverage about the upcoming General Elections in Singapore. Many people have a lot to say about the PAP candidates, the opposition, etc. I don't keep up with the news and what I know is from what hubby tells me. Here's my two cents' worth about some things I heard.

Talk about having a stronger opposition presence...maybe a 2 party government....we have 1 ruling party which forms the majority of the parliament. We have a few opposition parties. I may be naive but I doubt the intentions of the opposition. They probably have their own parties due to differences in belief, policies, personalities, agenda, etc and whatever. Is their true intent the good of Singapore? I cannot answer that but I have my doubts. I guess I am over-simplifying things. I'm not a politician after all. If I were the opposition, I would garner strength by consolidating efforts. I'm sure we all know the story about the chopsticks - it's easy to break a single chopstick with your bare hands but almost impossible to break a bunch of them put together. Now, in case the ISD is reading this, I'm not encouraging the opposition to form a single party and revolt against the government. I'm just wondering if they can do better if they have the good of Singapore in their intentions - common goal. Birds of a feather flock together. If they have the same objective or goal, they should be able to meet together and strengthen their presence.

Another piece of news from the hubby....DPM Teo Chee Hean....some talk about how he has made some comments which drew a lot of flak from netizens. A story about how he demanded VIP treatment at a grassroot event and refused to make a contribution for a Hungry Ghost festival event. This is what I told hubby.....DPM Teo is not a stupid person, I seriously doubt that he would put his reputation at stake by demanding VIP treatment. I think that it might, repeat MIGHT (in case I draw flak from grassroots leaders), be a case of grassroot leaders trying to impress their MP. This often creates a misunderstanding. I've seen it happen in the private sector and I'm not surprised that it does happen in the public sector. The top gun may be a simple, humble guy but his subordinates try their best to put up a good show to impress him. Can he refuse to sit at the VIP table after being shown his seat? That would have been disrespectful of the host, utter disregard for the efforts put in by his people and being difficult. As for contributions, since it was a Hungry Ghost event, which is religious in a way, I put it down to personal reasons why he didn't make a contribution. Besides, it might be policy. Making a contribution to one specific group will definitely lead to the need to contribute to all groups, to avoid giving the wrong impression of favouritism. You want to do something, do it for everyone. Otherwise don't do it at all.

I think as responsible citizens, netizens, members of society or just members of humanity, we all have our responsibility. Social responsibility. We are part of a bigger thing here. Give each other a break. Look at the common good. Oops, am I beginning to show signs of Marxism? No, I'm still a socialist. Yes, there has to be differentiation where it comes to people - meritocracy. I make my share of donations to the needy. Whether that is deemed a fair share or not is subjective. But I don't pity people who don't help themselves. Society doesn't owe any of us anything. Before you demand something from society, ask yourself what you have given society. Instead of just complaining, put your effort to a more worthwhile cause. If you think something is not right, do something about it. If you think the government not effective, prove you can do a better job. Constructive criticism, suggestions are good and in fact needed. But destructive criticism without any viable suggestions is just what it is - waste of resources.

Do I aspire to be a politician, a public servant? No. It's a tough job that you don't really get appreciation for. People think that it is a given and sometimes they treat public servants like servants. Utter rudeness. Do people come up to you and say, hey great job on keeping the city safe. No. They come up to you and say, hey why did you let that crazy guy kill that lady randomly? Ok, my comments here may be extreme examples, but you get the picture. I will not vote for the opposition now. Why? Because I still have my doubts. Will I vote against the PAP just to give the opposition a voice. No. Why? It's too big a risk. Yes, I admit that I am a coward. I will not put the security that I am enjoying now at risk. Many may say that I have bitten the bait of the PAP, that I have been blinded by their threat of security. So what? This is my home, I have every right to want it to be safe and stable. If you think that your one vote will help to give the opposition a few seats, without toppling the government, think again. What may happen if everyone thinks the same way? I don't dare to think. I prefer stability.

We are years from where the USA is now. They have many many more years of political history. We are still a fledgling by comparison. But honestly, I don't want to be a USA citizen today. I am a realist as well.

Enough said. Everyone has the right to their opinion. I'm just a woman with a lovely family, good job and happy life. What do I know?